Nervous breakdowns and despair

My mom had a nervous breakdown on our way back from vacation. We had to admit mom to a mental hospital that she just was released from today. I feel alone and like I a going to be trapped here. I always felt like I was the one holding everything together when I lived at home and I feel guilty not being at home the last five years. I know I am not at fault for this, but I still feel like I am. My dad has been almost no help at all. He says he cares, but just refuses to admit that anything is wrong. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I have to take care of everything, but every time I try I just can't figure out a way to make things work out. This sucks and I just want a way out. I am twenty-five years old, how can this be my life?

I'm not a morning person

I know I am being a baby, but I hate opening. It means me getting up at 5 am to go work and work with some of our more annoying crew and serve some of our more annoying customers. This week I have to open 4 out of 5 days and I hate it. Everyday I want to fall asleep earlier. Yesterday I was falling asleep on the couch at 5:30 in the evening. I feel like an eighty year old man falling asleep that early. I am not a morning person and the amount of caffeine I have to consume to function at that hour can't be healthy. With just to more days until vacation I am thinking I just be glad to not be woken by my alarm clock buzzing. With tomorrow being my one day not to open I was more than a little upset to realize I would have to go in early tomorrow morning to work on the schedule.

Long Time No Blog

Alright I haven't written anything in nearly a month, and haven't written anything interesting in far longer. What can I say, I've been busy. Somehow my 50 hour work work week has eased into a less comfortable 60 hour week. I find myself at work on my days off for several hours. Last week I was a work every single day. I felt like shooting myself on Sunday.

Meanwhile I am hoping to get promoted to the job I'm already doing. This seems to be what always happens to me. I see we need some to do a job and I do it, then I spend six months doing all of this extra work before anyone realizes what I've been doing. Before I was an assistant manager I was doing the crew schedule and the order for almost a year before I was told that I really shouldn't have been doing either in the position I was in.

In other news, my closet is finally fixed. For the last few months my clothes have been sitting in a pile on a futon in my bedroom. It is not fixed due to our diligent maintanice staff, but because my dad got sick of my complaining about it and came up to fix it. I didn't tell him I could have really done it myself, assuming I actually tryed. Oh well, it made him feel useful.

Now for the my best bit of news, I have vacation in three weeks. This is huge since I haven't had two days off in a row since my vacation to Canada in August. The thought of being several states away from my everyday life sounds unbelievable right now. I can't wait.